


Conciliabule

by GuileandGall



Series: Free To Be [12]
Category: Saints Row
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-23
Updated: 2014-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-26 16:56:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2659475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuileandGall/pseuds/GuileandGall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Johnny, Dex, and Remy decide to prank Troy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Conciliabule

**Author's Note:**

> Written to fulfill a word prompt. Conciliabule: A secret meeting of people who are hatching a plot (Johnny, Remy, & Dex), posed by Chyrstis

**Summary:** Johnny, Dex, and Remy decide to prank Troy.

 **a/n:** Written to fulfill a word prompt. Conciliabule: A secret meeting of people who are hatching a plot (Johnny, Remy, & Dex), posed by Chyrstis

**Conciliabule**

The clanging rang out loudly on the stone floor and drew a chorus of hushed hisses. “Seriously, Johnny,” Remy whispered a little too loudly to qualify as such. “Fucking hell, keep it in your pants son.”

“Well you know,” Johnny quipped.

“Can you two flirt later? Before we get caught,” Dex opined from his spot above the door. He held a hand out to Johnny and groped the air. “Phillips.”

Johnny felt the heads of the screw drivers in his hands. “That’s the star one right?”

“For the tenth time, yes!”

“The Los Carnales,” Johnny retorted in a grating tone, making Dex groan while Remy just chuckled.

Unable to not add her two cents, Remy finally broke down and added, “Rio Grande River”

“Calle Ocho Street,” Johnny grunted.

“I swear to Christ, you two,” Dex warned.

The pair choked back their laughter.

“You will turn this car around?” Remy asked quickly.

“Girl!”

“Boy!”

Dex groaned quietly. “Done.”

“Thank God,” Johnny sighed dramatically.

Dex climbed off the ladder. “No doubt. Because I was this close to stabbing you with a screwdriver.”

“Aww. Twue wove,” Remy said, offering her best impression of the minister from the Princess Bride.

“Hell yeah,” Gat agreed, slapping Dex on the ass.

“Motherfucker!” Dex replied, rubbing his hand over the now stinging cheek. He clicked the flashlight on and they all stumbled over toward the window, managing not to set any of the mousetraps off, though they might have gotten tacks in their shoes and boots.

The piece de resistance was the camera they ran to tape the whole thing. Because being anywhere near the church when Troy walked into his office the next time would be the worst call ever.

\- * -  * -  * -

“To tell you the truth, I really don’t want to hear it,” Troy called across the nave as he walked with purpose. He had managed to get to Apollo’s at the perfect moment. The coffee _and_ the donuts were fresh, and they were a million times better warm. The last thing he wanted to have to think about at least for the next twenty minutes was Gat, that crazy little blonde, and whatever havoc they were creating.

He balanced his breakfast atop his first cup of coffee of the day and fought with the old lock on the heavy oak door. Then he shouldered open the door and took too many steps. The snapping started first and he placed his hand atop the balanced breakfast to keep from losing it. He noticed the whirring sound only after surveying the happily snapping traps and the fact that nearly every flat surface was covered in tacks.

“Juvenile motherfuckers,” he muttered as a popping sound from above went off. An orange balloon bounced off his forehead as he looked up. Then they started exploding. The first thing to hit him was shaving cream.

But by the time he got out of the office again he was covered in things he did not even want to think hard about. He threw the cup and the little tissue-wrapped pastries at the opposite wall then wiped his hands on the shoulder of a guy walking past him. The glare he wore must have been intense because the guy looked at him like he wanted to say something but just continued on his way without a word.

He dug out his phone then headed toward the door. “Where are you?”

“Taking care of some of King’s boys. Why you wanna help?” Gat taunted.

“No, I’m going to shoot you. All three of you.”


End file.
